Zig Ziglar, a famous speaker, told a story about a daughter questioning her mother’s cooking.
She said, “Mom, why do you cut the end off the roast?”
Mom said, “I don’t know for sure, I just know you are supposed to, because Grandma taught me to do it that way.”
She asked grandma, “Grandma, why did you teach Mom to cut the end of the roast off?”
Grandma replied, “Honey, my pan was very small and the roast wouldn’t fit.”
We do so many things that were important once, but no longer apply. We just do them, because that’s how we were taught, trained. WOW! How do you walk? “…. like everyone else.” you might reply. But that’s not true. Have you ever seen first graders come skipping, all smiles and excited coming to class? Is that how you go into work or to school?
Probably not, you have probably been trained to enter a little depressed and resistant. I take my dog to the vet for baths, shots and many things she doesn’t like. When I get her out of the car, she is resistant and not cooperating with me. She is very nervous and afraid. It may not be that bad for you going to work on the outside, but inside I might be close.
My stepson has a bulldog and asked me one day to take his dog to the vet. I said ok and was ready to carry this big hunk of meat in to the vets if I had to. We got there and this hunk of meat lit up like a Christmas tree. He was excited. I didn’t have to drag him in, he drug me in. We got in there and they didn’t greet me, they greeted this dog by name. I couldn’t control him and he ran over and he got a big loving hello (in baby talk, of course) and the best back scratching a dog could get. Another person there, called me over and we did the paperwork. This dog was in love and obediently went over to the examination room and waited, a little put off, having to be with me again. But that didn’t last long as the nurse came in, politely asked if he could have a treat. WOW! This dog was at the spa for shots and physical exam.
Are there places you go, that you are excited to go into. I mean, really excited, like my stepson’s bulldog. Places that are so great that thought of ever going anyplace else, has never cross your mind.
Let’s go back to the first graders skipping into school. What would it be like if you were trained to skip into your work all excited about your job or school. How would that kind of training happen? How would you maintain that kind of training? How does my stepson’t vet maintain this kind of training for the dogs. What do those first grade teachers and vets do?
Hey, probably, dogs and first graders are too dumb to know they are supposed to be depressed and resistant, or have they just not been trained to cut off the end of the roast or cut off the fun and excitement. Maybe, your work or school has a bigger pan now and it could be fun and exciting. Is it possible, that school or work could be fun and exciting?
What if kids were trained to be responsible for their own education? Now, doesn’t that sound fun and exciting. No, they don’t have any idea how to do that, do they? They are too dumb to be responsible. What if they were un-dumbed. They might also need some sort of training or educational facility, time or support. They would have to come up with some way to train themselves or get themselves trained. They would have to assign themselves the needed homework, training and practice, as they would be responsible. Students would give themselves homework, wouldn’t they?
But of course this would never work, because children ask, “Why do we need to do that?” And you have some small pan explanation that doesn’t really make all that much sense and you say, “Because I said so and I know what is best for you!” The child then ends up with a habit machine or creature of habit that the teacher or school district thinks is best. It’s all worked out in the curriculum. These students will be able to get a good job, maybe even college, if they want.
Students don’t want a job, they want to have and live their dream life. Now, they are a creature of habit trained for a job, a small pan. Dreams, the big pan, seem impossible to ever have. We’d better train cutting off the end of the roast. Just train the small pan roast making, because a job is all that is really possible. A dog excited to go to the vets, no way. Going to work excited about being there, impossible. Being responsible and living a life of your dreams, now you are really dreaming.
If children were really responsible, teachers that actually taught and trained valuable stuff, would be in demand. They would be in high demand and well paid. If each student was given a budget and trained to be responsible then there might be some competition for certain teachers, seminars, videos, books, …. They would be looking for the education and training that really helped in the training of the creature of habit or building of the habit machine, that would be them. New systems, methods, ideas about training or building our habit machines might even emerge. WOW, they might even get excited as they start building a habit machine, their creature of habit to take them to their dreams.
Right now, students are forced to give up the responsibility of their training to their parents, teachers and school districts. We only do this because their frontal lobe isn’t developed completely and their hormonal bodies are so hard to control. I mean the natural state of children is out of control. “Control” is not in their vocabulary, freedom is. Fun and play would be all there would be. They want to be able to do whatever they want and that isn’t good for society. It’s impossible for them to be responsible.
Students are trained to give up responsibility for their education, training and building of their machine. They are trained to believe and act like they are incapable of teaching, training and building themselves. They are trained they are limited and only capable of small pan “job” possibilities, all other training is just stupid dreaming. They are trained to walk resistant and a little fearful into the classroom or job. They are trained: threats, force and bullying are the important means of getting a job done. They are trained, to “attempt” to train themselves by forcing themselves to do stuff they don’t want or need. They give themselves stress and pressure.
Trainings automates things. If a person is trained properly, it just happens when triggered. It does not need force. Force and stress are signs of a lack of proper training. When we attempt to consciously control without the habit machinery, it isn’t very stressful. Training gives control, not force. Force and stress are sign of a lack of training. If things are not working, it is a sign of a missing machine. Trying to do it without the growth habit machinery with force, only causes pressure and stress. People in places of authority and power, often don’t concern themselves with training. They often claim force is all that is needed and the person with the training will surface or if not they should.
The proper training is intrinsically driven. When a machine is built with external force or promises, the intrinsic drives tend to disappear. Intrinsically driven machine locks in the important details and powers the machine effectively. Students need to be trained to be responsible with intrinsic rewards. These rewards might be pride or feeling good about themselves, honor. That is they might be trained on ways to add value to themselves, their families and their community and catch themselves doing this and feeling good and proud of themselves. This was once called character. This would drive them to be responsible and do more to be responsible. Why did you do it? …. Because it was the right thing to do.
We know things are impossible, right? Like a dog excited to go to the vets? Like students excited and responsible going to school? …… and a roast being right that isn’t cut off. We do what we do, but maybe now, it doesn’t apply and new things are possible. Could you ever imagine yourself incharge and responsible for training your creature of habit? Growing and building your habit machine such that you are in control and able to take yourself on your most amazing journey to your Values, Dreams and Goals?
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