What habit machine are we going to build? Yes, we are all set up with our Captain. We have initiated our Values, Dreams and Goals machinery. We have our Habit Making Machines tooled up and ready to go. We have of Self Imagine and World Beliefs supporting our goals (I am capable and the world is ready to help). We’ve initiated the Journey machinery. We are all set and the first thing we run into is a snag, a problem, an obstacle, one of the stupid things in life. How do you deal with stupid, anyway?
They say life is problem, after problem, after problem, after stupid problem, followed by catastrophe! Yikes! Does that sound about right? WOW! Does that put a downer on all this excitement of building the most amazing habit machine possible. It’s almost like I’m back to where I started, things not working and being stuck or at least slowed down again. This road to success is not very fast. That amazing journey doesn’t sound possible, definitely not fun!
There you go! We’ve identified one of the most common things in life, problems. I was trained that they were something negative and sometimes very painful. I know as a creature of habit, I created all sorts of very creative maneuvers to avoid problems. I mean, we want things to work, don’t we? Problems stop that, don’t they? I mean, aren’t all my efforts to avoid problems justified. And my crazy antics, when problems catch me by surprise, are justified, right?
For me, I built an amazing machine that put off, dealing with problems. I got so good, I pretended they didn’t exist. Pretty nice, no pain. We creatures of habit do what is rewarding and getting away from pain is rewarding. Ignoring or pretending my problems didn’t exist worked for a while, but more often than not, they came back with fines, interest, or bigger problems. I kept ignoring them until they got so big I had to pay attention to them.
Than I developed tantrum and complaining habit machines that pushed the brunt of the pain onto someone else, I thought. I mean it worked sometimes and they gave me a break on what I owed, but not usually. It worked just enough, so like a good gambler, I worked on developing this act. But to be honest, I guess, it was just another way of not owning up to my problems and solving them. Quite the habit machine I’ve built. It doesn’t get me to my Dreams, but it seems to keep me away from the pain of my problems, at least temporarily.
Problems mean pain. Pain means, me as a creature of habit, want to avoid them. What is I could decide what things were problems. You might be thinking: “Isn’t it obvious. Are problems just problems?” What if it wasn’t fixed up that way? What if I got to say: “That is a problem and that is not.” That would be nice! I could take something that was normally a painful problem and decide to neutralize it. What if I could actually make things rewarding. You know, “That is rewarding and that is not! (just because I decided). Hey, I could take a painful problem and decide it was rewarding. Wouldn’t that be neat? Can you imagine taking painful things and making them rewarding.
The weight lifters all push their muscles until they start to painfully break down and they call it the “Burn”. They love “burn” and go for it all the time. They made a painful thing rewarding. Skaters push themselves to slide on rails and other crazy stuff, fall and bang themselves up. They jump back up, brush it off, excited they are getting closer to mastering their trick. They wear their “bang-ups” like medals of honor, again rewarding. “Belonging” or finding a place you know what to do to survive is rewarding. Battered women often go back to their abusers, as at some level they belong and have made it rewarding. Sad, but rewarding. Sort of like me, going back to avoiding my problems and creating greater abusers or problems. Sad, but rewarding when I get away with it, …. for a while. Hey, it’s what I know how to do! It’s the habit machine I have. I was just doing what was rewarding and this is what I got. Maybe, now I have some options.
So how could we make the most common part of life, problems, rewarding. It’s seems a little wrong, doesn’t it? Problems, rewarding? They just don’t seem to go together, do they? I know if, I’m going to build my machine to do anything new, I will probably run into things I don’t know what to do, ... or problems. If I make this problem like the gold of a thing that has been stopping me, I would get excited. I’ve found it! I’ve found it! I’ve found it and now I am going to solve it. If I solve the problem and build my machine to handle them, I could get to my Dreams. It is like finding gold isn’t it? Not convinced, are you? This is a training and your probably still trained like me to feel problems as painful. Training to make them “gold’ is still in the works.
Wait! If I avoid problems, am I avoiding life! Life after all is problems! Yikes! You do remember when you go for a goal, your going to get problems! Trust me, some big unexpected ones that are painful. That’s why I stopped setting goals. But does that mean: I’m dying! When you don’t have anymore problems, you are dead. But I hate problems. If I try to live more, I’m going to get more problems! This is depressing! What is a guy to do? Get better at avoiding problems and slowly die or get better at dealing with problems and become more alive! Why did life have to be problem, after problem, after problem, after problem, followed by catastrophe.
Maybe that’s why old people seem to fade away. They just slowly give up more and more and more on solving their problems, until there is nothing left. I mean when you take life on, it is so frustrating and unfair. There are lots of problems, some really unfair and wrong. It give you ulcers, high blood pressure and drives you to drink, take drugs, go on shopping sprees, eat feasts, journeys into the wilderness or just staying in bed.
What if I decided to make problems rewarding? I can do that, can’t I? I could make it like gold. It could be life’s way of showing me what to do? I remember a story about the God believing guy who was stranded on his roof when it flooded. He knew God would come and save him. A guy on a log came by and said jump on, there is land ahead. He said, “No, God is coming.” Then a guy in a row boat full of other people said there is room for one more and he said, “No, God is coming.” The water kept rising and other people offer to help and he said, “No, God is coming.” the water kept rising and he drowned. He went to heaven and he asked God, “Why didn’t you come save me?” God said, “I sent a guy with a log, a row boat, and many other people!” Maybe we need to recognize problems as a way Life guides us. Maybe problems are there to show us how to build our machine to get to our Dreams.
I know I have set many goals and I get all prepared for the problems. I’m ready and I start going for my goal and an unexpected problems comes up. One that I wasn’t expecting or wasn’t prepared for, then another and another. I hated it. I had it all figured out and now this! It always happened. So I stopped setting goals. I even stopped setting New Year’s Resolutions. I mean, I had it figured out and handled so I wouldn’t have to deal with the pain of problems and no matter how well I planned and figured it out, something went wrong: painful problems showed up. It just seems so wrong, unfair, and unscientific!
I didn’t realize, but I might be a little arrogant. I thought I was smarter than Life! What if that is just it. You can’t figure it all out. You can’t set a goal and not have unexpected things called problems, show up. For me, I settled in only doing what I definitely knew how to do, No Problem! I guess that makes me stuck! …. and dying! To grow and come back to life, it looks like I have to make problems rewarding. You know, like the “Burn”!
If I decide to make problems a rewarding experience, then I can validate and prove Life. I know I am presently trained to make problems painful. How do I go about training myself to make problems rewarding? I’m going to take on a small goal and when a problems shows up, I am going to notice it! Yes, usually I move so fast into escape, I hardly notice it. Okay, first step, notice them. Take a deep breath, calm down and just notice you have a problem! No, big deal! Keep calm! It’s just a problem.
Next, pretend this is good! Say, something like this is “perfect”. I’m feeling a little like its a good thing. It’s not gold yet, but this is a start. Tell yourself you can solve this problem: I can solve this wonderful problem. I can build a machine to handle this amazing problem. I’m excited, this is good. What kind of machine should I develop. Already to a little habit machine to solve the problems. This is good! Nice Job!
Wait! I initiate my problems solving habit machinery. I don’t know what to do! Is that a solution? Okay, my problems solving machinery is weak. Look for a solution! >>> Nothing! Now, what? Is it impossible and should go back to avoiding problems. No, calm down, deep breath, you can solve this! Remember, I am taking on a small goal. This are small problems to practice and develop my problems solving habit machinery. I can do this. I will come up with a solution. Calm down! Deep breath!
Remember the road to success is defined as abundant failure with little wins that must be held onto and put together for success. So, with my little problem, I am going to try things and they may not work. That’s okay! I am going to get back up and clean up and go for the next good idea. This is the road to success. Do as Winston Churchill suggested: Go from failure to failure with the same great attitude, you are on the road to success!
Edison, one of the most prolific inventors, sure knew how to travel the road to success. He commented on his 10,000 failures as not being failures. He said each time he failed he was just that much closer to success. He had eliminated one of the things to try. When he failed, he probably, even got more excited. He was getting closer and closer.
Me, I was trained, if you fail, get depressed and feel bad about yourself and your capabilities. I was trained, such that, my attitude kept going down, down, down until I couldn’t take it anymore and I quit. The pain was immense, you would have quit too! Now, I realize my training, my habit machine was inflicting that pain. I want to build a machine, train a machine that give a rewarding experience with failing. I want to be trained to go from failure to failure with a great attitude. I want to, maybe, be edisonian and get a better, more excited attitude with each failure. Yikes! That is a training like a Mighty Super Strong Power Weight Lifter! Feel the “Burn”! That takes training!
So I am the 90 pound dripping wet weakling. Where do I start? I’m starting with a small goal. This means small problems I can lift. Every problem I run into, I am going to get excited. Yippie! A small piece of gold, I’ll pretend. Oh, No, here comes the pain. I am going to take a deep breath, face it and take it on. I’m going to fail, fail and fail again until I solve it: burn, burn, burn! Then I am going to boast and wear my failures bruises like a “skater’s badge”. I have decided to train to be guided by my problems. I’ve decided to make these problems the gold to grow and develop my habit machine.
I am going to build that little machine for myself, then take on bigger and bigger projects. I’ll start out with lightweight projects and work out and get stronger in this failure training. Then I’ll take on heftier or larger projects and keep training. As I build these little machines, I will also be building me a strong failure machine to speed down the road to success! No more being stopped by failure. Failure is becoming the guiding gas that powers me down the road to success.
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